Day 45 - April 22, 2011 (1 day to go)

I can't believe that my nephew turned 17 today. My baby he once was. He was the first live child birth I witnessed. Happy Birthday Jeffrey. In two days I will have completed my Lenten journey of fasting from social networking. Why did I wake up to an email for a contest but you could only enter on Facebook? LOL It never ends does it? Tonight I went to a birthday dinner and I should've known that it would be a mess! Supposedly it was a birthday celebration/going away dinner but it didn't feel like anyone was leaving. During dinner the mention of Lent and rest days came about. I thought it was pretty funny because I just chose to continue my fast on Sunday's as well. Anyway tonight's reflection is going to be about words. Some things are just better left unsaid. Without being able to rant on social networking I've become accustomed to using my voice instead of print. with recent emotions up & down like a roller coaster I've come back to my senses that not everything felt should be said. In times where animosity is present its even better to just not say anything either. I just hope that I can remember all this when I do get back on social networking and not get that cyber courage and vent out a month and a half worth of events. I know it will all be well and that the truth will always prevail.

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling or grammatical errors*

No status updates.

Day 44 - April 21, 2011 (2 days to go)

As this journey closes in on the finish line I've had a hard time finding what else I can specifically reflect on. Tonight I figure why not just reflect on reflection itself. this has been something that has thrown me into the depths of every emotion through this journey. I thought the withdrawal felt from no social networking was tough, then tonight I remembered that we are always our worst critic. Sure anyone can judge you and criticize you, but it will never affect as much as you doing the same to yourself. Going without on of the biggest distractions from life has forced me to seek within myself. No matter how many substitution I've tried to use in an effort to compensate. At the end of the day its my mind trying to sort through a million thoughts. A tough daily reminder of how tough life truly is without social networking. Not that social networking makes things any easier but perhaps it just distracts you enough to forget the rough times. For some it may have the opposite effect. I suppose it all depends on how much you allow it to control your life. How deep you allow the addiction to get. No matter what the case may be, what you share through social networking is always a reflection of yourself.

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling or grammatical errors.*

No Status Updates.

Day 43 - April 20, 2011 (3 days to go)

Happy Stonerversary...I mean Happy Birthday Hitler...no, no that's not it. Ummm, Happy 3 days to go until this Lenten journey is over. From lots of self control to tons of frustration (and that was just today), I have gone through it all so far. Speaking of frustration, tonight I'm going to reflect on personal communication. Ok so more like venting. Just like social networking, personal communication can cause much frustration. This, of course, can cover both sides of texting. Is it always better to be able to hear the voice and be able to understand the tone of what's being said? Sure there is cyber-bullying but is it easier to be able to read the words and (mis)interpret it in your own way? And then there's venting... Everyone needs an outlet. I don't care what age, sex, race, whatever you are, everyone has to find a way to get things out and off their chest. I have since come to the conclusion that it's much easier to vent on social networking just to get it out, even if you pretend everyone is reading, than to vent to your friends in real life. I felt today when venting as though I were such a drama queen, when in reality I just needed to release my frustrations. that in turn forced me to hold things in and remind myself that I'm reflecting now and not turn this entry into a bitchfest. Personal communication can bring you up but it can also bring you down just as quickly. Of course I've become more adapted to personal communication I can't wait, metaphorically speaking, to be able to have my friends that live in the computer. I love and adore my real life friends (not so much acquaintances) but I think they're getting sick of me quite frankly. Three more days left to stay strong, that's all I have left to say tonight.

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling or grammatical errors*

No status updates today.

Day 42 - April 19, 2011 (4 days to go)

I'm having a hard time deciding on what to reflect on tonight. So let's go with how consumed social networking makes you. It's easy to turn a blind eye at the earliest or most obvious sign of addiction. Of course the first thing said could be "I'm not addicted" or "you can't get addicted to social networking". You sure can and I can definitely speak from experience on it. When I heard a story of friends who went out to dinner and their friends husband/boyfriend was on his phone all night using Facebook and other apps I was almost disgusted. I know I was bad about it but not to where I couldn't put my phone down during dinner. I see it all too often but have never thought twice about it. How annoying are we as a generation now to constantly have a phone stuck to your face? I suppose that could include texting also. I've also thought about how branding is fully taking advantage of social networking to gain your attention also. Just about every print ad, every commercial I see or hear mentions twitter or facebook, sometimes both. Its as if addiction is inevitable.

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling or grammatical errors*

No status updates today.

Day 41 - April 18, 2011 (5 days to go)

I have logged yesterday as my 40th day without social networking. However, on my calendar at work it was today. It all comes down to perception and how you count it. I am sticking to yesterday since today marks "rest day" #1. As I begin to reflect on my journey without social networking I question myself on how I've been able to stay so strong. the first thing that comes to mind is that I'm a person of my word. If I say I'm going to do something I do it, or at least make an attempt to do it. Maybe I can teach myself to do the same with going to the gym. In the best of times and in the worst of times I have questioned my words, and my strength to keep them. I have been reminded through self reflection how much people peak empty words. there are so many times I've come across people in real life, as well as on social networking, who say things just to say it. It makes me ponder how so many can speak without meaning. Wasn't it Dr. Seuss maybe, I can't recall off hand, that said "Say what you mean and mean what you say"? Perhaps I just value words to much. Call it what you want, I am me, the only person I know how to be.

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling or grammatical errors*

Day 40 - April 17, 2011 (6 days to go)

Another day filled with things to do in an effort to keep my mind from any urges or temptations of social networking. That is until it came time to get a new phone. That's a very big decision for me. Its not like when I lived in Europe and would get a new phone every six months. I had my blackberry for 2 1/2 years and it never did me wrong until recently with the batter dying so fast. In the end it was going to be better to upgrade than to buy a new battery. My big urge was when I couldn't decide between staying with Blackberry or switching to iPhone or Droid. In the end I decided on my own to stick with Blackberry since it suited my needs...for now. Who would've thought I could make such a big decision on my own without consulting my social networking friends? Now will someone please tell me why I woke up to 25 emails from facebook!? Why didn't I think this through more thoroughly enough to turn off all my email notifications? This is gonna make for some interesting reading when I am able to log back in. As this concludes my 40 days and 40 nights I will begin to reflect on my days as I make up the "rest days" during Lent.

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling or grammatical errors*

No status updates today.

Day 39 - April 16, 2011 (1 day to go)

Happy Birthday to my nephew. Another year into adulthood. OK now to the matter at hand...crap I forgot to file my state taxes. Thank goodness for the extended deadline this year. So I think I've gotten a bad case of shortitis! Knowing that one week from today will be my last day in this journey. I am fully expecting anxiety to set in something fierce this week. Today was fairly uneventful otherwise. Next weekend I will be at a birthday celebration downtown. So I hope my phone batter lasts long enough for me to log in at midnight. Or do I wait until after we do the family Easter celebration then log in? Decisions decisions...It's OK, I have 7 days to torture myself with that. And to think that tomorrow is 40 days and 40 nights. So frustrating! thank goodness it's almost over because I'm almost out of paper in this notebook. I have seven pages with a couple to spare and I'm sure I will do a special reflection entry...if I can pull myself away from social networking long enough to write. Look here I am already knowing its going to consume me. Sheesh!

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling or grammatical errors*

No status updates today.

Day 38 - April 15, 2011 (2 days to go)

Such a long day it was. It's crazy how you can go from having such a good, humorous day at work to an embarrassing drama filled night. I had another day of absolutely cracking myself up! Even with my cheesy jokes about outie navel oranges. then I was actually able to leave work early to get to a birthday dinner. Then it all began...pure chaos. these are the things I would normally tweet in the third person. But seriously, who goes to the liquor store and breaks a bottle, a big bottle, after paying for it in front of a long line of people? Should've been a sign because it was a birthday gift. I must've been 10 shades of red! Then at dinner I sat across from Ty and his girlfriend. Needless to say it was definitely a twitter night. I must admit though I didn't have any urges for it. I knew with only about a week to spare it's not worth it. You know what sucks is writing the day that I'm journaling for and seeing it almost at 40 and remembering I have to go to 46.

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for spelling and grammatical errors*

No status updates.

Day 37 - April 14, 2011 (3 days to go)

If there was ever a day I was grateful I gave up social networking it would be today. All day I felt so many emotions from anger to devastation. I thought about what I would've updated after today. It wasn't so much a temptation but more of a realization. I say realization because of the reactions and comments I imagined. It would've turned something that was already a mess into an even bigger ordeal. Did I mention how much I dislike drama? I have no doubt that today would've been full of it had I been on social networking. OK enough of that mess...OK one more thing, I think today was the end of yet another friendship. OK moving on because I wasn't to stay away from negativity as much as possible. So I had to shrug tonight (awwww #ShrugLife) because when updating my blog I saw that I only have 3 days to go...til I hit 40 days and 40 nights but actually 9 because of the "rest days". Kind of frustrating actually. Oh well, I know that not participating in the "rest days" is better for me in this journey. I can't lie though, I've thought about saying screw it an only going 40 days and 40 nights but if I've gone this long, 6 more days is nothing. Of course that's what I say now.

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for spelling and grammatical errors*

No status updates today.

Day 36 - April 13, 2011 (4 days to go)

I think that I really need to stop journaling late at night. Lately when I journal I've been forgetting things I wanted to mention and the next morning it hits me. Oops. Things like helping my mom with her twitter account and then wondering if that's considered breaking my Lenten vow. Or trying to close a push notification on my iTouch and it opening even though I immediately close it out. In 11 more days I won't have to worry about it. I may go into shock come Easter when I'm able to log in again. It will probably take me a while to get used to social networking again. Without sharing my "status updates" I've realized it was just another step in this journey. A different mentality has come over me. I kinda like it actually. I'm very curious to see how things will change come Easter Sunday. It seems so close yet so far away. Even going a week without turning on my laptop I felt so consumed when I finally did turn it on. And mind you I was only playing games on Pogo. Its all every intriguing to me. So a little bit about today. I was definitely (not defiantly) cracking myself up at work. I should've been named Country Crock because i was on a roll! Just call me Sweet Cheeks! HA! I'm quite glad that my coworkers humor me and find me amusing sometimes. Who would've though that would happen in real life and not just social networking?

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling and grammatical errors*

No Status Updates

Day 35 - April 12, 2011 (5 days to go)

In preparing for tonight's journal entry something interesting has crossed my mind. what has really been going on with me for the last week? And no I don't mean that "time of the month" either. I have gone the last week without turning on my laptop, updating my blog, or talking to Roo! there aer few things I can recall that I passed my time with at home. Such as playing words with friends, chess with friends and pogo games on my iTouch. Have I become consumed with my iTouch? I've had several urges but no serious temptations for social networking. Have I finally gone through all the motions of detox and am absolved of it? If so its a very strange feeling. I can't even remember what day (without looking) I last sent out by text or wrote down a status update. I'm also very easily distracted. I've also reminded myself how I prefer my handwriting in blue ink not black, yet I've been writing nightly with black ink. OK whats wrong with me? WOW! Oh I broke the week long thing tonight by using the laptop, updating the blog (up to day before last) and checking on Roo.

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for spelling or grammatical errors*

No Status Updates

Day 34 - April 11, 2011 (6 days to go)

(Written 4/12/11)

As Britney Spears would say, Oops I did it again. HA! I completely went to bed last night (4/11) with no though of journaling. It's not that I had a day where I was so exhausted I went straight to bed. I just can't believe I did that with no valid excuse. Thinking back I can't even think of what I would have journaled from my day either. Shame on me.

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for spelling and grammatical errors*

No Status updates

Day 33 - April 10, 2011 (7 days to go)

Happy Birthday Dee! OK so why is it that there's a ton of commercials that have Twitter and Facebook mentioned? And even contests through Facebook? Crazy. I guess I never noticed before because I had the luxury of logging in at any time so now that I don't I tend to notice it more. This weekend was a quiet one as far as urges and temptations go. Hell I haven't even turned on my laptop in about five days. that itself is so strange. Of course we'll have to see how tomorrow goes at work. I just hope that the next two weeks go by fast and uneventful. I said before that I had my first post decided on but I think I've changed my mind. we shall see what comes out when its time. Perhaps I've just become accustomed to not having social networking...for now. I have taken up chess with friends now and boy am I out of touch! I need to seriously work in my strategy game again. Oh one thing I've though about today is how I was asked again what Lent is. Growing up in a Catholic community I took for granted that everyone knew what it was. there are many that don't. Its very interesting to me.

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling and grammatical errors*

No Status Updates today.

Day 32 - April 9, 2011 (8 days to go)

Such a busy day preparing for Dee's surprise birthday party. I don't think she was very surprised but she was very happy! Friends, food & gifts! Someone asked me today if I missed social networking. My response was that its not so much the social aspect of it but more so not being able to update anything. Then I thought about it after the face and from day one I feel that's the hardest part I've dealt with since the beginning of the journey. today wasn't as exciting as others as far as journaling goes. Except of course Stinky Pink's little brother Doo Doo Brown. LOL

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling and grammatical errors*

No Status Updates today.

Day 31 - April 8, 2011 (9 days to go)

Please tell me why I am still awake at 1am and journaling! Of course I'm extremely exhausted from last nights adventures but I can't believe I'm still awake & functioning. so I was absolutely exhausted all day long. Why is it that when I'm tired temptation hits me harder? Perhaps it was the silly pictures or the funny stuff we said, heard and saw. I managed to get through work successfully, at least I think with no major mistakes. :-S Lot's of planning for this weekend and even a scare that the big surprise is spoiled. It was close but still no clue of what we have in the works. I thought for sure it would be an early night but noooo, of course its not. I fought all urges tonight by playing lots of words with friends and pogo games on my iTouch. I still feel like I'm reverting back when I did so good for a few days. I forgot to mention how I spoke to my good friend tonight and that shithead didn't even notice I've been silent on social networking. Oh he's in so much trouble right now. LOL Makes me think back to how some people checked up on me and others didn't/haven't. I mean who do these people think they are having lives and not noticing I'm no longer flooding timelines on Twitter and newsfeeds on Facebook? GOSH! LOL Ok totally kidding, kind of. Oh let's not forget the humorous moment I found out __________ did delete me from Facebook. I love my friends for finding that out for me. No more popcorn for me I guess. HA! Oh and should we go over how I may just HAVE to see NKOTB in Vegas? So tempted out of spite even though I have no desire to because I don't care for Backstreet Boys. OK, enough. I could really use Twitter right now to lay on my guilt trip. Instead I will do it by phone. Yes, I'm becoming quite accustomed to communicating "the old fashioned way". Now if I could only get people to answer their phones when I call. Lazy effers only communicating on social networking. yes I'm completely being bratty right now.

Until we meet again...

PS. How did my son fall out of bed then want to sleep in my room?! WRONG! UGH I want my social networking back!!! *sticking out my bottom lip and pouting*

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling and grammatical errors*

No Status Updates today.

Day 30 - April 7, 2011 (10 days to go)

Here's to hoping that I can write for today in one night, even if I have to hold my eyelids open with toothpicks. I am so pooped after this crazy day. Let me start by saying how fun its not to get home and be in the comfort of your own bed only to have to get back up & dressed to go look in your car for something. No bueno! Why do the craziest and funniest things happen when I can't update anywhere about it? From the cornucopia to Rachel Charles. There was definitely not a lack of entertainment today or tonight. It was bad enough struggling throughout work with tons of temptation for social networking but to go through the night with more laughs and new memories is just...well lets just say that even if I went into detail I'd have to promise I can't make this shit up! I could go on for pages but I won't, I'll just spare everyone the details. I swear my life seemed so boring and average until I decided to give up social networking for Lent. Things such as a bartender giving out gummy bears (yes the candy) are just things no one would believe unless you were there. I'm just blessed to have such great friends. To share these unbelievable stories/memories with. And let's not forget about how I thought today was Friday all day and even asked how the funeral was. :-( RIP Kerry

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling and grammatical errors*

No Status Updates today

Day 29 - April 6, 2011 (11 days to go)

Whew! What a day today was! So distracted all day awaiting Nina's arrival. I was just so excited to see her. Today was an easy day at work, when I was focused. I tried to spread out my work to last me the entire day and help keep the urges away. Of course all to no avail. Naturally we have a never ending supply of "things to do" at work so I never have to worry about looking for something to do. Its just all the urges and temptations sitting on my shoulders once again. I may have checked my personal email 20 times today. Not that I was really expecting anything but just to make it feel like I was checking something. So much on my mind that I feel the need to get it all out but I can't...At least not until next week. Then came dinner time with Nina. She was special enough to meet my parents & kids on her first time here. Not everyone gets that luxury. I couldn't even tweet that I was with her. *sigh* That's what I get for cutting myself off from the friends that live in my computer. Soon enough I'll be back and i bet my mind will shut down because there's so much that I'll want to say at one time. It must just be that I like to torture myself. OK, so again I must wonder that I near the bottom of the page why my handwriting changes. Gets sloppier in a sense yet still legible. things that make you go hmmmm... See what happens when you're living under a rock on the Arc kickin it with Noah for the time being? UGH!

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling and grammatical errors*

PS. I had Scott take off the Facebook notification from my phone this morning because it was already driving me insane. Even without looking at it I knew it was there. Power of the mind.

Day 28 - April 5, 2011 (12 days to go)

After a boring uneventful weekend with no social networking comes Monday. I almost felt like I reverted back to week one or two instead of week 4. A day filled with so many urges and temptations. It doesn't help that I've stopped writing down status updates and/or texting them in an effort to stop compensating one with the other. I thought it would help by removing all aspects of social networking and communicating like a real human being. Where do I get all these bright ideas from? What happened to friends stopping you from doing bad things? Friends shouldn't let friends give up social networking. Some of today's temptations came from Jess and I discussing some things from last week, and us not being able to say anything but to each other. Who does that? Who says something big than says we can't say anything? Well at least we have each other for it. Found out a friend is coming to visit and so excited about it. Such a shame I can't Facebook or tweet about it. Can't wait to see her!!! Then after my phone acting up numerous times tonight, on top of the battery draining ridiculously, I get a Facebook notification! Like seriously WTF!? So now I'm stuck with a blinking red light and the Facebook icon on my screen to tempt me even more. Oy Vey! And the blinking red light is going to irk me more than the icon. when I finish and survive this journey I'm not gonna know what to do with myself! Friday I may just turn my phone off because its going to be bittersweet knowing that I'm unable to attend the funeral. While I already had mixed emotions I did still want to go. For now I will take each day as it's own. I got this!

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling and grammatical errors*

No status updates today.

Day 27 - April 4, 2011 (13 days to go)

Another night listening to the howling wind reflecting on today and this journey as a whole. Who's idea was it for me to give up social networking for Lent? And who's idea was it to have "rest days" during Lent? Did Jesus have rest days during his journey? Perhaps I'm confused with the great flood. Maybe for Lent I should've gone to live on a boat to ride out the storm. Today was back to the daily grind. And for the last almost four weeks that has included fighting and resisting temptation. yes folks its back. While I'm not on my phone, the temptation to log in is there. This includes the curiousity of what's going on. Such as why are people still following me on Twitter when I haven't tweeted anything for 4 weeks as of tomorrow?Why do my friends insist on posting things on facebook when they know I'm on this journey and I receive the email notifications which knowingly give me temptation. I could've really used some ranting today too! From resisting another tantrum at work to getting fussed at on the phone. Why are funerals so stressful? Is everyone just ragging at the same time....except for me? *sigh* I can do this! Only 19 more days to go.

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for spelling and grammatical errors*

No Status Updates today.

Day 26 - April 3, 2011 (14 days to go)

As I lay here gathering my thoughts I'm listening to the wind howl. As annoying as the wind is, there is something soothing in its howling sound. Today was another uneventful day. Sleeping in, cleaning, coaching staff meeting, etc. I even missed the first half of Army Wives thanks to the slow pokes at the pizza place. So many moments of complaint yet no urges or temptation. I'm really starting to feel like my life has done a one-eighty with this whole no social networking thing. In just a couple days I went from numerous urges and temptations to nothing. How can this journey be such a roller coaster of temptation?

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling and grammatical errors*

No Status Updates today.

*note - as I blog the countdown 2 weeks seems so close but then I remember I still have the 6 "rest days" aka cheat days to add on to it. :-( Way to burst my own bubble.

Day 25 - April 2, 2011 (15 days to go)

A day of nothing exciting creates for an uninteresting journal entry.

So uninteresting that I fell asleep writing so now I'm updating on day 26. My day consisted of me sleeping in, waking up, cleaning, eating, shopping...ok let me stop there. On the way to eat we saw a brush fire on the mountain. Crazy enough I didn't have any temptation to Twitter or Facebook much less take a picture. Then off to Wally World where mom & I proceeded to act like children and basically play hide & seek with my children up and down the aisles. On the way out we saw a couple of police officers walking in. Come to find out some guy was held up at gunpoint in the parking lot. Again, no urge or temptation to update. Later in the night I received another surprise text that made me smile. Thanks Erica! After which of course led to a phone conversation and I heard a very heartbreaking story of another death. So much of it going around with people I know. Sure death happens daily but you don't hear about it so often with people you know. What is really going on?

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed an am not responsible for spelling and grammatical errors*

No Status Updates today.

Day 24 - April 1, 2011 (16 days to go)

Happy April Fool's Day. This day didn't start off so well. Mostly in part that yet again I woke up late but this time I was late to work. I was able to speak to Jenny today and got a little more insight on the pending funeral services. I am hoping to make it. At work I only heard of 2 pranks, both equally good. The first is one of donuts having the jelly replaced with ketchup. Only a handful were able to be pranks but they were good sports about it. The second was four of our closers at work calling in. Brilliant! Poor Res Manager was stressed but I think pissed when they all showed up to work. Of course these are things I would have been tweeting and updating to share the comedy. Yet I sent no updates today. It was overall a pretty blah day with plenty of work to keep myself busy. Which reminds me that I still need to file my taxes. I didn't even update when I got "got"! Damn Big Moon got me so good today! I would have updated like crazy with this one. He absolutely made my day. He called me from a number I didn't know and was speaking with a creepy voice. I had no clue what the hell was going on and almost hung up on him. In the end I was actually a Power 106 (Abq) winner of front row tickets to a show next month. After the week I've had he really made it better. Thank you! That was the biggest urge today. Even funnier was my friend's boyfriend heard the call on the air and was telling me about this dumb ass chick who's so clueless on the radio. he didn't know what to say when I laughed and told him it was me. After everything that's happened this week and having no social networking (except my important log in that I included in my rosary the other night) I have thought about the dependence on social networking and how communicating the "old fashioned" way is much more personal and enjoyable. The irrelevance of 90% of my updates, entertaining or not. Sure there were other urges and slight temptations today but i didn't' find it as difficult to fight it like before. What an eye opener this week has been in so many ways.

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling and grammatical errors*

Day 23 - March 31, 2011 (17 days to go)

Here I sit at the end of what turned out to be a melancholy yet somber day. After staying up late last night to say a rosary, I didn't get much sleep. When I awoke, the world seemed so mellow. Almost as if life was so dull. Oh, I am so thankful that I have friends that have a vampires sleep schedule. Poor Roo let me unload on him last night. I never though I needed that but I guess when you're being "the strong one" for everyone else you need someone too. (the money's on the dresser) Back to today, I was so blah at work. I only had a few urges, one being because Kari tagged me in a picture on Facebook so I got an email notification. Damn, my friends need to give me a heads up before they do that. I really didn't feel a need for social networking today. I checked up on a couple people and sent a few emails back & forth but I didn't deem it necessary to be very communicative today. I did get a few great laughs from some emails but aside from that I stayed pretty blah. I didn't text or write down any status updates either. Time to get some more rest and prepare to make more contact tomorrow.

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responisible for any spelling and grammatical errors*

Oh p.s. Funny moment was my dad's reaction to me giving up social networking. Only he would be shocked yet a smart ass at the same time.

Day 22 - March 30, 2011 (18 days to go)

My heart is so heavy as I journal tonight. I don't even know where to begin. Today I came to realize that me choosing to give up social networking has been a curse and a blessing. Sure I've been tempted before today and it felt like torture but today was hot & cold. I wanted to log on with everything inside of me but at the same time I knew I wouldn't be able to handle all the emotions that would come with it. Sure I was emotional last night when spending what may be the last night with Crisco before his new journey's in life but a whole new emotion came today. I went back and forth today with cheating or breaking my vow during Lent. This has been the biggest temptation yet. Before I get more into that I must quench #theThirst and mention how Oscar made sure I was still "alive" tonight while playing words with friends. And naturally he knew right away that I was off Twitter for Lent. It still blows me away how my social network, ok wait not even social network as a whole but Twitter, friends are concerned enough to check up since I gave no warning I was going "Ghost". (Thanks DJ CO1 and Eddie Go for asking yesterday) Of course some ask when I see them or text them but to go out of their way to contact someone they've never met in person or have never heard the voice of. So again thank you Oscar and the others I've previously mentioned. And you know what's crazy is the "non-blockheads" that care the most. What happened to my million sisters? And now that I think about it two of them I met through Ustream while watching DJ Dummy. So I guess I could thank him for bringing these people into my life. Next, today seemed to be a day of reconnection with some of my closest friends that I've gotten lazy about keeping in contact with. They are the ones that we don't have to "catch up" but instead we pick up where we left off no matter how much time has gone by. Even throughout my emotional day I reached out and they put a smile on my face when all I wanted to do was frown. Then the others (outside of Gianna and RP) were because we lost a great soul today. Within 24 hours of finding out he had fallen ill he was gone. When I got the final notification phone call I knew. I didn't want to answer the phone but I knew I had to. This is where all the temptation really came about. Having to hear my best friend cry just tore me apart and broke my heart into a million pieces. Hearing/seeing a female cry is hard enough but to hear/see a man cry is one of the worst things to endure. Especially when there is absolutely nothing you can do but listen and be strong for them. Then this evening I broke my own heart and caved. I had no other choice but to log into Facebook to send a message to Bobby or let him find out "through the grapevine". With no current contact information I logged in, sent the message and logged out making sure I didn't see anything else. I didn't think it was possible for my heart to sink any more. I had to tell Bobby that we lost Kerry today. Of course I now have current contact information and will make sure from here on out it stays that way. I know now not to question things. Today quickly confirmed that people do still know how to use a telephone for making actual phone calls. People do still correspond through email. Some things are just meant to be left off social networking. Knowing today that my brothers are in mourning, some more than others, I had to reach out the "old fashioned" way. I don't hate much but I absolutely hate that some of my closest are in so much pain & sorrow right now. Kerry you were loved more than you'd ever know. You are already missed by so many. Leave it to you to bring the pham back together. May you shine ever so brightly down upon us now for you have become one with the light. With this loss I have decided to no longer sign my journal with "until tomorrow' but "until we meet again" because tomorrow may never come.

Until we meet again...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for spelling and grammatical errors*

Status Updates:

2:41pm - RIP Kerry. My brother, my friend. Life will never be the same without you. The Masonic community has lost a great person.



PS. Jess almost broke me a 2nd time because I got an email that I was tagged in a picture. I knew what it was and had to ask her to email it to me so I could see it. Princess looks absolutely amazing in her wings. And when she is ready, my brother & bear will be there waiting for her.

Day 21 - March 29, 2011 (19 days to go)

Talk about an emotional day! If there was a day in the past 3 weeks that would break me it would've been today. Today was a day that had me in tears from the get go. Knowing that Crisco is beginning his move tomorrow really affected me. Then with all the phone conversations and updates it was completely ups & downs. Even my boss questioned my strength through such big events. I know I can do this! Even if I compensate by texting. I felt so awkward today by making myself so vulnerable and showing all my emotions. Today was also a reminder/eye opener to some things that tend to get overlooked and brushed aside. Times like this usually lead me to unload frustrations on Twitter and show my "soft side" on Facebook. A time when a dependency on social networking is almost inevitable. Although it was great to see everyone tonight I feel like an ass now for letting emotions get the best of me. I did have two people ask me where I've been since I have been away from social networking for 3 weeks. That always makes me feel good. Not that I like feeling missed but it shows people care enough to notice I'm gone. I don't always get that feeling so it's nice to have reminders. I think it goes back to everyone, myself included, taking convenience for granted. Of course with that also comes the old saying "out of sight, out of mind". I'm also thankful for the ones that do care and the ones that let me depend on them & support me throughout this journey.

Until Tomorrow...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for spelling and grammatical errors*

Status Updates:

8:41am - not only did I wake up late but now I'm mad because I was dreaming about the _______.

11:25am - I need a Vegas trip soon!!!!! Like very soon! Ahhhhhhh

11:42am - Leave it to my Uncle to send me a dirty text to make me laugh after Jess calls & makes me cry!

12:31pm - my boss just hugged me and as I cringed I started tearing again. Damn that Crisco Kidd.

8:23pm - Lord help me! Only for Crisco would I take a shot of patron!

Day 20 - March 28, 2011 (20 days to go)

How do I explain today? Today was a day of ups and downs, urges and temptations. I was stil exhausted from this weekend today. Being tired I hoped today would be easier. I didn't necessarily have temptation whiel at work but I had the strange urge to log into a website. Is this one of those things with breaking the actual habit itself and not so much about the addiction? I was good all morning until I sent a couple of texts (literally 2) to the ones on my mind. Not expecting a response but knowing I'd get one. Then the first response (which wasn't expected) had talk of great news! I was so dorkishly excited it wasn't even funny. Wait is that even a word? Dorkishyly...oh well it is now. I am so looking foward to the month of my birth and its not even for my birthday. My day was complete after this. All stayed well, I only checked my personal email about 20 times throughout the work day versus the 200 times daily in the beginning. I even only checked yahoo news once right before I left the office. Even at home I don't try to type in Facebook on the internet browser out of pure habit. then came the time of the night when I become so frustrated as a mother that I needed to vent all my anger and frustrations with no outlet. This was very tough but I seemed to manage. Aside from my exciting text the only other major temptation was looking at the calendar and realizing that Lent truly isn't 40 days and 40 nights but actually 46 calendar days and nights. *gasp* This means I have an extra week to go on tihs journey. So while not thoroughly thinking about it I counted the days on the calendar about 5 times. My only thought was that I had a defective calendar. Then off to Google I went. Soon it all made sense. The "Rest Days"! I've spoke of Sundays being cheat days and although I choose to not use it to my advantage it made me feel cheated. (After the countdown gets to 1 day I will countdownt the 6 rest days) Oh, one other temptation was when my daughter asked who went to her performance that she invited this weekend and seeing her expression become so sad when I told her that Michelle and her family were the only ones. She was especially sad because a certain person wasn't there to make it a "perfect day".

Until Tomorrow...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling and grammatical errors*

Status Updates:
9:55am - "that's like throwing a magnum at a chinese dude" <- coworker said something that made me think of that & I cracked up!!!!

10:58am - why are hiccups so funny to people? I'm the one that has them and even I'm laughing.

1:42pm - Ahhh so super excited!!!! Someone totally made my day and i can't tweet or fb him because I thought it was a great idea to give up social networking.

2:01pm - if you like to truck & fish...

5:34pm - Isn't Lent supposed to be 40 days/nights? This year its 46 days/nights. :-( UGH!!!!!!

8:26pm - My daughter just asked who all went to her performance that she invited. Then she said she was sad because Crisco didn't go. Now she's all bummed.

Day 19 March 27, 2011 (21 days to go)

What an exhausting day! Surprisingly enough I didn't have too many urges or temptations throughout the day. Especially considering all the events of last night (and yesterday during the day). Perhaps being so tired makes you too lazy to even think about social networking. Crazy thing is that I sent more status updates today than yesterday when I had more to update yesterday. (Michelle and I text each other) Today was also my girls Lobo baseball performance. It was such a beautiful day to perform outside also. Watching from the side was hard because I knew the girls still needed help in some parts of the routine. Although, so did many of the other teams! Overall they did good considering the chaos that went on before and after the actual performance. I'm proud of them regardless though because they showed up and did their best. Funniest thing is that my mom forgot to press record on the camera so I don't have video of the performance except for the grainy one I took on my phone. Its ok though. That would have been a definite status update though. Then there was Army Wives tonight. Lets just say this episode had me crying the entire hour! Its ok though because I think I needed a good cry. Another urge was uploading the video from last night onto youtube and not being able to post the link to it everywhere. Its a good one too. Can't wait to see the pictures from last night so I hope NMNights.com uploads them soon. Then again I'm a little worried to see them at the same time. I hope my days continue to get easier yet again without social networking. Tonight my iTouch decided to take me to echofon when sliding the lock thing over. It took everything inside me to exit it without checking my 24 @ replies or reading any tweets. Even though Sundays are "cheat days" I've not broken vow or used the "rest days", as they are truly called, to my advantage. I feel that it would just make matters worse. Kind of like having a sample of your favorite ice cream on those small spoons but not being able to have a full scoop. I do still get my email notifications, which are far & few in between these days and the urges aren't as bad. Granted its the Facebook ones that drive me to the nearest mental institution. And speaking of email notifications, why are people still beginning to follow me on Twitter when I haven't tweeted in almost 3 weeks? Oy vey!

Until Tomorrow...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for spelling and grammatical errors*

Status Updates:

12:42pm - OMG I almost fell in the shower & all I could think about was Kari! I can't stop laughing!

7:00pm - Yay! Army Wives time. Get the kleenex.

Day 18 - March 26, 2011 (22 days to go)

As I sit here on the night of Day 19 I can't help but laugh at the events of Day 18! Lets hear about it... Today was a very difficult day for no social networking. Especially considering I was on the go literally all day. Beginning with a day full of "DRIVE". Went to the 2nd stop of the all day event to support organ & tissue donation. Naturally any time spent with Crisco had numerous update worthy events. Funniest thing was him telling my son "there's a party in my head"! I had just said that a few days ago. Not only did I receive tons of information I was unaware of that I wanted to share but I heard tons of hilarious randomness. Next up was the 3rd event for "DRIVE" at the Albuquerque Rescue Mission where I stopped by to donate some clothes. That was a quick stop on the way to my little buddy's birthday party at Michelle's. Again, the conversations there almost always have update worthy comments. Let's not mention the hours we spent playing with balls. Golf balls that is... We must've stacked at least 15 pairs of golf balls. Not so easy at first but exciting each time its done. Many pics were taken that I couldn't share. Talk about frustration!!! Even after I left the girls were able to stack them 3 high. How cool is that? Last stop for the day was out of town. Ok it was only Santa Fe but it's still out of town. Rize Nightclub was giving proceeds to American Red Cross. It was also Crisco's last night DJing in NM...for the time being. As with any night out with Kari there are many status update worthy moments. Like the fact that she was wearing heels!! And of course the fact that I had to put them on her feet for her. Yes I struggled throughout the night/early morning without social networking. Definitely a day full of great moments, hilarious memories and great pictures & videos. Some of the best are Crisco actually playing NKOTB for me, which is something that I never ever thought would happen in this lifetime. And Kari...lets just pretend she was so excited for NKOTB she was blown away. Ok so it sounded good, but the truth is she fell, not only once, but twice! Yes, no exaggeration when I say today was very difficult to not be able to send updates to Facebook and Twitter. Its times like these that make me wonder how I ever lived without social networking before. What did I ever do with all the randomness & memories? It's almost like thinking about communicating without text or even email. Of course who really communicates via email anymore? Things that make you go hmmm...

Until Tomorrow...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for spelling and grammatical errors*

Status Updates:

1:06am - Kari only made it to 1am with heels on. LMFAO

Day 17 - March 25, 2011 (23 days to go)

Talk about a rough day! Well the day itself was good but I struggled without social networking! Temptation was having a staring contest with me and I suck at that game. My only thought was that I was fighting a losing battle. It began shortly after I got to work and by the time noon decided to show its face I had checked my email on my phone at least 30 times, no exaggeration. It doesn't help that I felt like I woke up and every ounce of wit had escaped my brain. I really wonder if this is what drug addicts go through when doing detox. A few great days and think your in the clear then along comes a Mac truck and runs you over. At one point I really felt I was going to start twitching, all jokes aside. I do feel that a part of my struggles today were in part because of me being agitated by a conversation I had today. And why am I so emotional lately? I feel like Rosie from the Jetson's after getting my wires crossed. Then of course I checked the blog to check views to see if anyone actually reads it. I think I made the numbers go up by refreshing 50 times throughout the day. LOL I'm going to blame Ms. P because I knew the link was passed on to her. I can't wait to hear the feedback from her & Anthony! Of course then the stankness comes out because I know I can't log in to twitter to see. Damn I really miss them. Oh wait, her tail better not be having story time during my hiatus. Ok, back to me. The thoughts of reevaluation sat heavy with me today. The boss & I even had a conversation about it. #UnhealthyFriends *insert picture of fried egg* This is your brain, this is your brain with unhealthy friends. Oh...funny part of the day, my boss (acted like he forgot I gave up social networking) found out today and promptly asked if I was twitching! I about pee'd myself laughing. Especially since today was such a rough one. It was so bad that not even music was helping. I was even listening to NKOTB. Crazy right? Even Michelle was heaving a rough one but I think because she was off work today. I'm truly hoping that my next 3 weeks don't continue in this manner because if it does a computer might have to high five the wall. Perhaps the next rough day I have I'll give Brooklyn Grey another read. Have you read it yet? What do you mean no?! You better go cop it. #ShamelessPlug And now that I think about it, is UStream considered social networking? If no then I'm gonna be upset because that means I missed the KMR show tonight. Or is it on Sundays? Oh hell, I give up. Like I told my boss today, this whole social networking nonsense is forcing me to communicate almost like a real human being again. And with that it shows me how lazy I've gotten about that. When did it become easier and more convenient to communicate through social networking? And what genius decided it was cool to give it up for Lent? Oh wait, that was me. Even to sit down and write. And by write I mean actually get a pen and paper to write. Who does that? In case you weren't already aware, I actually journal in my notebook then blog it to share my journey. I forgot how hard real life was thanks to social networking. These first 2 1/2 weeks of my journey have definitely proved to be interesting through. Quite the experience I must admit.


Until Tomorrow...


*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for spelling and grammatical errors*

Status Updates:


9:15am - why was I ok until Jess made me sad?! Dammit now I'm gonna be emotional all day. Let's kidnap Crisco & not let him go.



11:20am - having MAJOR twitter withdrawls today!!!! Not cool. So rocking out to NKOTB to keep my mind off it.



1:18pm - why is my face breaking out now?! No Zelda & Agatha you are not welcome to visit me every again, go away.


1:39pm - LMFAO my boss just asked me if I had the twitches cuz he just found out I gave up social networking for Lent.


2:40pm - How did I get nominated to either have or raise the office baby?! LOL This is why I love my coworkers.


3:22pm - all this talk of chess makes me want to play! #checkmate

Day 16 - March 24, 2011 (24 days to go)

Today was such a fun filled day! Didn't get to work as early as hoped but that's ok. I did good all day without urges or temptations until this afternoon. I got to thinking last night about how I don't pick up my phone to check twitter, out of habit, anymore after 2 weeks. Good thing I didn't say anything because I would've spoke too soon. With the time between work, running my errand and practice I came home and was watching TV when I really started thinking about it. I had about 20 minutes to spare and wasn't sitting well at all! I stared at my uberless phone for about 5 minutes. It almost felt like day 1 again. Then after practice my daughter and I took the scenic route back to my office by way of the radio station. This is where it was really tough! The BMDG's, the Power Squad and a few others were there while Crisco Kidd took the Block Party outside. Jessica supplied some food (thanks again) and everyone else provided good company and entertainment while filling me in on the array of listeners that had stopped by. Here is where it was all about fighting the temptation. Crisco asked my daughter if she wanted to go on the air with him. After she told me I took her into the studio to watch since she'd never been in there. Next thing you know they are both talking on air as he "interviewed" her in regards to her performance this weekend. It was the cutest think in the world and how could I not want to tweet and Facebook about that?! Then I took the cutest picture ever of them. My hadn't almost seriously started twitching from not being able to upload it! Even though Jess tried to encourage me I stayed strong and just text it in hopes of someone else posting it and tagging me in it (hint hint). We took a group pic ... uno, dos, tres #OnlyInNM ... and off to work I went. All I could think about was social networking! Just when I thought I finally made progress I fell 10 steps behind. *sigh* That was almost the best 30 minutes of the week, and could very well be depending on tomorrow. Even while work has slowed down I wasn't tempted but leave it to my friends in spur of the moment memories to drag me down. EFFERS! LOL Even worse was listening non-stop to my daughter go on and on all night until she went to bed. Crazy little girl. I know I had things I wanted to journal from this morning but its since become obsolete in my mind. Oops! Maybe Michelle can remind me. Oh how could I forget my few minutes at the bank? Like my sweet Molly Nu-gen reminded me, I'm such a Rockstar! Something I noticed last night is that the easier it seems to be able to go throughout the way without social networking the longer my journal entries get. Coincidence? It also seems that crazier things are happening to me forcing temptation in my face. Such as seeing _____ while driving randomly. What makes that even better is I know that he didn't see me. Although, I must admit I kind of wish he would have so I could through up the deuces! HA! Did I also mention that the longer my journal entries get the sloppier my already bad handwriting gets? I may need someone to analyze my handwriting from this "hiding under a rock" journal after my time is up. That would be very interesting!

Until tomorrow...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for spelling and grammatical errors*

Status Updates:

9:15am - Really people?! Twitter DM spam about mafia family nonsense?! This is NOT MySpace! SMH
(mobile notifications)

2:47pm - who goes into the bank but doesn't take the check to deposit? Me, that's who!

2:55pm - Is it wrong to smile & wave to the guy behind me cussing me out for not turning left at the yellow light? LOL

6:28pm - My daughter says "I bet I can do a better toe touch than Crisco!" (And she has too many friends to shout out, that's why she said no)

11:21pm - Finally its quiet. She is in bed. Crisco has created a monster! She hasn't stopped talking about him yet.

Day 15 - March 23, 2011 (25 days to go)

Today could've easily become quite the day from hell. Instead, interestingly enough, I took the higher road, got control of the situation and turned it around. Someone, quick, pinch me because I MUST be dreaming! What would've become yet another work related twitter rant never existed. And now that I think about it, I only wrote down one status update today. Maybe it was a somber day with all the talk of Elizabeth Taylor's passing. Or maybe it was because I know I had so much work to get finished that I didn't have the time to allow myself to rant. Even Michelle mentioned that I was awfully quiet today. Of course she didn't have many updates herself. My phone was quiet just about all day also. I received a few texts throughout the day but not enough to distract me. Speaking of distractions, I did lose focus for a few minutes at work and while trying to find it I did have the urge to log into Facebook. Old habits die hard, isn't that what they say? Oh, maybe I'm still heartbroken because I now have confirmation on 2 of the girls that quit the squad on Tuesday. Did I mention that I renamed Michelle to make up for yesterday? And I now introduce Ms. Grizzwald! HA! #grizzlylovers A smile was brought to my face when I heard from "my Samoan friend" today. Coolest dude in the world! Then at the end of what ended up being an eerily calm day I received a random text from one of my favorite twitter buddies. He wanted to check up on me since he & another one of my favorite people to follow & interact with hadn't seen me tweet in a while. As odd as it may sound, it gave me such a warm feeling to know that 2 people I've never met in person cared enough to check up on me. I know people in real life who wouldn't ever do that. So a very special thank you to the twitter timeline husband (since he tried to divorce my timeline once) and Ms. Stankness herself. Not only did he care enough to check up on me but he gave support with my lenten fast! Its people like this that I am blessed enough to get to know through social networking that make the addiction all worthwhile. Now lets not forget that I never told anyone on social networking that I was going under a rock for 40 days and 40 nights. I now have a feeling that this journey is also going to be a reevaluation of people I surround myself with. After all, as humans we do feed off those around us. Perhaps not physically but emotionally, socially and thoughtfully. As they say, birds of a feather flock together.

Until tomorrow...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for spelling and grammatical errors*

Status Updates:

9:54am - Guys in the office are talkign about bears and one of them mentioned grizzly's. #GrizzlyLovers

2:08pm - UGH! I have butterflies in my stomach & a weird feeling. Need to find a way to focus to get back to work. Maybe it's just gas.

Day 14 - March 22, 2011 (26 days to go)

Today has been such an emotional roller coaster! It began as a good day, although it was slightly gloomy outside. Arrived to work early, or should I say on time (LOL) and within 30 minutes I became such a grouch. I really need to stop letting work get to me like that and just become the employee that shows up, works and leaves. Too much emotion that is not necessary. (My twitter friends know that all too well) About 30 more mintues later it began... The madness that is! Yes folks, I was apparently wearing the hat of the Mad Hatter! Pure comical craziness with a side of my awesome A.D.D. I'm going to blame Kari for it. Its all her fault for trying to add to my grouchiness by bringing up "the Bash picture"! Thankfully it had the opposite effect and her comment, yet again, cracked me up. She did have a valid point though. Of course the mood itself didn't change until after I had a one-sided cussing match with my work email. *insert tweet bitching about MS Outlook* This is where all my randomness began and the texts really started to be exchanged! Between the Peanut Gallery (aka. My Sweet Molly Nu-Gen, Kari Mufasa and Michelle)...wait how did Michelle manage to get through the day without a new name? Oh damn, see how A.D.D. I still am. Sheesh! So anyway, the Peanut Gallery had me laughing so hard that it took me triple time to actually complete a task at work. Oops! It was so worth looking like the village mental patient staring between my phone & my computer screen while laughing so hard but trying to stay quiet at the same time. My coworkers had absolutely every right to think I was high. Can you believe that even Michelle said she couldn't keep up with my A.D.D. today? And lets not even begin to discuss how she said the funniest ever today! #GrizzlyLovers That woman...I tell ya. Ok so while the Peanut Gallery definitely had me more than occupied today, it was so hard to not want to share "The party in my head" with the rest of the world! I mean after all thats what I'm here for, everyone's personal entertainment. The laughter was so ridiculouts that I felt as though I needed a nap when it all stopped. *cue Roo* But noooo, I'm not allowed to nap, I'll blame Roo for that just because I can. HA! After the Peanut Gallery had another run it was time for practice. Time for another spin on the roller coaster. I because so bummed and almost even cried at practice. *gasp* I know, who would've though I really had an emotion besides bitch & comedian. Apparently a total of 3 girls quit the squad today leaving us with a squad of 4 now. Of course with that came major temptation. Ok it wasn't a major temptation but still a temptation none the less. Tonight wihle having another text conversation I had a thought. Ok so it kind of hit me like a ton of bricks, but my addiction to social networking isn't so much the social part but more about just being able to share my mind with the world. Perhaps I should just go back to my blogging instead. Ok, ok you're right, I am too much of a social butterfly for that. Again, it was just a thought. I do greatly miss my "social interaction" on Twitter and Facebook. I have finally come to the conclusion that come Easter I am going to finally delete my MySpace profile since it is pretty much obsolete for me now. I must be on teh verge of delirium now because I am totally rambling. I have to remind myself this is my 40 days/40 nights journal and not a regular spill your guts journal. Sweetback gets the blame for that one.

Until Tomorrow...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling and grammatical errors*

Status Updates:

8:48am - Seems to be another day of picking and choosing. Not to mention not everyone's in the office yet. *sigh*

10:38am - What exactly does cocoa butter and sweat smell like?

10:40am OMG I'm totally cracking myself up down here at my desk!!!

10:49am - Ahhhh I want to log in soooo bad right now! I can't keep all these humorous thoughts all to myself!

11:01am - RT @michjay: maybe they're running away to LA together #grizzlylovers <- #iDied *here lies daloved1* ***of course I didn't really tweet this but this is how I wrote down my update and shared with the peanut gallery via text***

11:10am - Make.It.Stop. Party in my head and I can't stop laughing.

12:12pm - Is it nap time yet? All that laughing wore me out. LOL Know of any bearskin blankets I can use? #grizzlylovers

12:30pm - OMG so what song comes on next on my iPod? The Shoop Shoop song (its in his kiss)! LMAO Want some popcorn? #grizzlylovers

12:44pm - Remember when we said girl please don't go. And how I'd be loving you forever. Taught you bout Hangin Tough, as long as you got the right stuff.

12:52pm - meow meow, meow meow, meow meow, meow meow...No you have to hold his hand right...meow meow, meow meow

5:40pm - I am so bummed right now! 1 girl quit the team today and apparently so did 2 others. :-(

Day 13 - March 21, 2011 (27 days to go)

What an interesting day today turned out to be. While today was an extremely busy day at work there was yet again the temptation of curiousity. While the situation is hilarious and we've laughed for 24 hours about it now, I'm still frustrated at teh nerve of some people's children! Its not serious enough for me to break my lenten vow. The words that are going through my mind make me want to tell someone off whiel at the same time I just want to make fun. Not worth my piece of mind and all the frustration, even if it makes us all laugh. I will definitely be making light of the situation in my own way. Had a few status updates today that made me laugh. I've also come to realize that majority of my updates/tweets/posts are "had to be there moments". I love that because in the end they are good enough memories to mention again. Oh...so I have one less texter to keep my mind occupied, but BBJ stepped in and filled the void today. Thank goodness too because I think today I could've slipped. After work I got more use out of my Pogo app on the iTouch. Made dinner, finished homework with the kids, then came the start of me time and with that came the twitch. *Cue the texts* I was laughing so hard I had tears! Kari and Crisco had me laughing so much. I literally had to pick up the phone and call so I didnt' feel like such an ass laughing so much all by myself. After another hour of laughing on the phone the temptation is gone. Perhaps its because its 1:40am, I'm already in bed and the laptop is shut down. Sure I could grab my phone but that sucker needs to charge because it was beeping at me! Not to mention I'm about to be defeated by sleep.

Until Tomorrow...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for spelling and grammatical errors*

ps. I forgot to mention I've already decided what my first Facebook and Twitter updates are going to be. :-) Sadly y'all will have to wait 4 more weeks to find out what it is. *evil laugh*

Status Updates:

11:06am - Why does it always stink in the office by the fax machine? These guys need to learn how to bathe right.

11:28am - LMAO BBJ on the phone and Jamie Foxx in my ears with ______ pics in my mind are...ummm...WOW!

1:01pm - You ain't gotta lie to kick it

1:45pm - What are the chances of printing something on recycled paper and its the same revision number as the one I printed but from the previous year? WHOA! I almost got confused!

3:16pm - Tish saw 2 guys outside carrying a knife & fork almost as big as them and her only though was "She would die from not being able to social network this!"

Day 12 - March 20, 2011 (28 days to go)

Today proved to be another temptation filled day without social networking. Curiousity mostely was my biggest temptation. Just because I say I don't care what people say doesn't mean I'm not curious to know. Was I deleted after this weekends dramas? What pictures got posted after Friday night? I knwo of 3 that went up but knowingthat makes me want to go and look at the reaction of them. Or even go and make a comment. The email notifications have dwindled down, as have the text messages. Instead of remaining curious and giving into temptation I have decided that it will be funner to be able to log in and reminisce at everything thats happening during my 40 days/40 nights. Or so I hope. Maybe those emails will start rolling in again. More tempting moments today included my first viewing of what may be my newest guilty pleasure trainwreck reality show on VH1 called Love and Hip Hop (I think). Then of course there was Army Wives tonight. Can't wait for next weeks episode. I don't like cliffhangers...damn them! All in all today was a very quiet day with lots of Words With Friends and a few texts later tonight discussing a few funny pictures and what not. But overall a very relaxing Sunday. Can't believe its still 4 weeks to go. Please continue to wish me luck.

Until tomorrow...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling or grammatical errors*

Status Updates:

8:07pm - Oh Em Gee!!! Can't believe Army Wives ended like that. Bastards...making me wait.

Day 11 - March 19, 2011 (29 days to go)

So as you can see I haven't journaled for 2 nights. I will go back to these two nights later. Today was not a difficult day to go without social networking but I did have quite a few urges. After fighting throughout the morning to sleep in I eventually got out of bed to a very very sore body! No, its not what you think. I just came to the conclusion that 3 days of coaching a cheer clinic and standing (literally) in heels for 5 hours straight will not leave you feeling refreshed. I was thinking about all the smartass replies I would get on twitter from me tweeting about how sore I was. I did feel better after a hot shower, but that only lasted so long. Went to a fundraiser matanza today to support my cousin's employer. Food was great and seeing some of my family I don't see often was great. They did have a band and amateur wrestling as entertainment. The latter really urged me to mention it online because it was so funny and seeing the different reactions from my children completely cracked me up. Then later on back at home I was worn out, sore and had a lot on my mind. Then when boredom set in is when more urges tried to tempt me. Although I didn't get to have one of my highly entertaining twitter rants, Kari got to hear all about it. This rant would'vce even made its way to Facebook. Dumb people! Today would've been another day of laughing and reminiscing about last night. GOOD TIMES!!! I can safely say that yes, social networking had become a serious...ummmm...place to express myself(outlet). This is the first major time I felt the need to express myself since Lent began. By thte time Easter rolls around I'll be so over it. Yes, I know, que sera sera.

Until tomorrow...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling and grammatical errors*

I had status updates again today but my genius self (still acting out on my internal rant) cleared out those messages from my phone without thinking about needing them for jounaling. Way to go... *high-fiving myself*



Day 9 - March 17, 2011 (31 days to go)

Happy St. Patricks Day...aka the one day a year everyone claims they are Irish. Started teh day off running around the city. Took my daughter to cheer camp and got sidetracked into coaching for a bit. Before I knew it, it was time to head to work (yes I was scheduled off) to pick up money then pick up breakfast for the office. Today is the day we're celebrating the boss's birthday by surprising him with breakfast. It was great. Stayed & ate then back to coach cheer clinic. While there my phone stayed in my purse again so there was little temptation. By the time I got home I was so pooped. I mean literally exhausted. I was asleep on the couch before 10pm. Woke up, went to bed, and that was all she wrote. The only thing that urged me to log into Facebook was to send a couple birthday wishes. Happy Birthday Will and Happy Birthday Trevon.

Until tomorrow...

Status Updates:

10:25am - This oittle girl is about to catch 27 if she gives me attitude one more time. She is such a brat.

4:33pm - my daughter is being scouted for SuperStars (the competition team). She's such a show off. LOL

8:27pm - I love that I give up social networking for Lent and now Jess is sending me her updates!!!!

Day 10 - March 18, 2011 (30 days to go)

Oh boy was I tired last night! Today I woke up a bit sore and didn't think cheer clinic would get me like that. After all I'm only coaching. Today was a very very interesting and trying day as far as social networking. Ok not so much the day, but the night! Cheer clinic wore me out yet again and I would've had yet another early night in bed but kari was kind enough to invite me to the Spring Break Jam. This is where allt he temptation began to set in yet again. From seeing a midget to the wack show openers to the free cd to the chick fight. Then there was all the guys walking around shoving popcorn in their faces and burning holes in my butt. LMAO Do you see how this would be very tempting for me? Then the texts added in didn't help. Oh did I mention the picture I got with the only artist I wanted to see? Then of course after the show was our downtown adventures. From bar hopping to crazy stalkers to our pictures with the downtown familia. It was neverending and I had to keep it all to myself. OH BOY! The end of the night almost reminded me of my first encounter with a now great friend of mine. Awwww Geico! Oh lets not forget the mini drama with _______ . *insert twitter rant here* All in all it was a definite never ending social network update night! But I managed to get through it, not sure how, but I did!

Until tomorrow...

Status Updates: (well the ones I didn't deleted during my rants)

9:03am - 2 days of cheer clinic will leave your body sore & asleep before 10pm even if you aren't doing anything.

10:10pm - All these guys walking around with popcorn are killing me!!!! Hahahaha maybe they'll give me some!

(there was more but I deleted while ranting)

Day 8 - March 16, 2011 (32 days to go)

So here I sit 8 days into this journey, all cozied up in my bed bringing the day to an end when I realized that I needed to journal. Today was quite easy for me to avoid all social networking. I took the liberty to get a few extra hours of sleep because I took the rest of the week off from work. I woke up with my normal workday alarm and responded to a few texts, made a quick phone call and then began to feel guilty for not going to work. I then took my daughter to the first day of Spring Break Cheer Clinic. She had such a great time she wants to attend the full day tomorrow. My phone stayed in my purse during clinic (I'm coaching) and I wasn't tempted at all. A busy mind... This evening only gave me slight temptations, nothing near the temptation of last night. Then a few hours later on teh 10 o'clock news I saw that Nate Dogg passed away! Things like this I would've seen on twitter early in the day. I felt like a late bloomer finding out so late. I did see it on Yahoo news after that. One plus of twitter is the breaking news. Or is it a plus? Maybe just a quicker realization of hte awful world we live in. Michelle had MAJOR temptation tonight. I had to be her rock. Looks as though we are going to take turns with being hard core support for each other. My texts today were far & few inbetween and I was surprisingly ok with that until this evening when my mind finally relaxed I felt the extreme need to communicate. As I've been writing its come to mind that I truly would've been ok without my phone today. Is that whats next? This goes back to my thoughts on how as a people we have become too reliant on instant gratification - news, communication, money,etc. Why has teh human race become so lazy?

Until Tomorrow...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling and grammatical errors*

Status Updates:

8:45am - Why do I always have guilt for taking a day off work if I'm not going anywhere?

8:47pm - Got confused and almost did the sign of the cross when passing the gas station. Its a sign that we need help to afford it.

8:52pm - Since when does the heights smell like the south valley? Ewwwww.

10:38pm - RIP Nate Dogg (Damn the things I miss on twitter)

1:01am - Nothing like drunk texts I can't understand. LOL Kari you're gonna have some 'spaining to do.

Day 7 - March 15, 2011 (33 days to go)

So here I sit 7 days into Lent and I've had the most temptation yet. I'm journaling about an hour earlier than I normally do. I could really use my support right now. I'm like two double D's just swinging around with no bra. The texts have dramatically slowed while at the same time my email facebook notifications have increased. Who though it was a great idea to give up social networking without turning off the email notifications? Oh yeah, that genius was me. Here I thought I was cool because I still received certain notifications and wouldn't have to log in to see anything. Yeah not so much. #NotWinning ! Temptation was already there at work today then even worse tonight at home. In an effort to get control of it I let my children play games on my laptop for a couple hours after I got home from work. then the lovely "Magnolia Effron", whoever that may be, had to write some mysterious crap on my FB wall and make it the biggest temptation yet. So I immediately text my partner in this, Michelle. We have to stay strong for each other. I must say that with only 1 week into this I have decided this is much more difficult than the years I gave up alcohol and yes, even chocolate. I am a Leo and curiousity is really trying to kill this cat! Time to step up on my texts or get a book and read. Hmmm maybe I should just watch "Social Network". Oh did I mention yet that I haven't written down any of my would be updates since day 3? Its not helping any. OY!

Until Tomorrow...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for any spelling and grammitical errors*

No Status Updates written down today.

*edited*
So I had to come back to journal some more because I decided to publish my first week of my Lenten journal and sent the link to Michelle, Jessica and Kari. Jess had to go and bring me to tears! She has a good point and with me being so motherly by nature I am going to make it my motto! She said "Perhaps your 40 day break isn't for you BUT for others...Your words are amazing!!!"
The idea that my thought can inspire or help others is so foreign to me. I am just me and sometimes I use journaling as an escape to clear my thoughts from flying around in my head. Thanks for your words Jess.


*edited*
Found some status updates in my phone.

Status Updates:

1:27am (previous night) - this year will mark 15 years since I graduated HS. Damn I feel old now.

10:34am - You know you're getting old when someone is outside with a system and the bass is disturbing you. #STFU

6:17pm - Do you eat m&m's one by one or by the handful?

Day 6 - March 14, 2011 (34 days to go)

Tomorrow will mark one week with no social networking. Although today seemed to fly by, the week itself seems like its taken forever. Ok so not forever but mor eethan 6 dyas thats for sure! I stayed very busy at work today with very few texts to keep my mind occupied. Tonight, however, I had a few curious moments (cravings you could say) where I had to remind myself of no social networking. I played Words with Friends (WWF) and my Pogo games as I do every night but I didn't feel satisfied and started searching for a late night snack. I quickly talked myself out of ice cream when I glanced at the clock and saw that it was already 11:40pm. So I ate two brownie bites instead. Wasn't what I wanted but it seemed to do the trick. I hope this doesn't continue because I don't want to gain weight. This whole time change is something else I tell you. I had a few thoughts of Facebook. Thinking about the people its allowed me to reconnect with and the major one it gave me and took away just as fast. Perhaps the friendship from years ago wasn't meant to revive itself. Of course time goes on but I'm such a dweller and have a hard time letting go of people I don't need in my life. Maybe Facebook is the devil! What would that make Twitter? Happy Pi Day!

Until tomorrow...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for spelling and grammatical errors*

No Status Updates written down today.

Day 5 - March 13, 2011 (35 days to go)

So today was a very trying day for no social networking. There were numerous attempts to reach for my phone for twitter, my iTouch for both (Twitter & Facebook) & my laptop for both. I missed teh tweetdeck notifications tonight while playing Pogo games. I even looked at my blank "new window" telling myself no Facebook. While typing away earlier on a site completely unrelated my mom though she caught me on Facebook. She said I was typing crazy like I do when on Facebook. Perhpas it was on my mind more due to lack of texts, bbms, etc. to keep me occupied. This does to show that I most definitely am substituting one with the other. What can I say? I've always been a talker, as my daughter follows in my footsteps, adn its quite obvious I'm a typer also. I wonder how the others are doing without Facebook or Twitter. I remember seeing a few others were giving one or the other up also. I just didn't warn anyone. Its kind of disheartening to see that not many have contacted me by phone or email but such is life, out of sight, out of mind. With 35 days to go it seems like no end in sight. Especially when dealing with a pre-pubescent 12 year old boy and a spoiled & bratty 9 year old girl. Most of my updates would have been about them today. Kids will be kids. There was a funny one from last night though regarding my kids. You know what they say...kids say the damndest things. Wish me luck this week without Michelle since she is on family vacation for spring break.


Until Tomorrow...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for spelling and grammical errors*


No Status Updates written down today.

Day 4 - March 12, 2011 (36 days to go)

I'm actually journaling Day 4 in the middle of Day 5 because by the time Day 4 came to an end I was so tired I dno't think I lasted 15 minutes once my head hit the pillow. So lets go back 24 hours. I stayed quite busy today. Started off by going to get my nails done. What woman doesn't love a mani & pedi? I normally tweet during my pedicures but I only struggled a few times in fighting the urge to log in. I almost took "Brooklyn Grey" to read again but I didn't. After leaving the nail salon (which I got tons of compliments on the new design) it was time to get ready for the baby shower. Dropped mom off at my auntie's on the way to the shower. The shower was great! All the girls together for one big gab fest in honor of baby Magnus. I didn't really have an urge to social network there at Mellisa's house because I was too busy socializing in person. I tried to leave 3 times. 1st time we left & mom wasn'st ready so teh kids and I went back to hang out some more. 2nd time we left & went to pick up mom but the son remembered he left his phone so we had to go back and get it. You know what they say, 3rd times a charm. Went out shortly thereafter and spent some quality time with Kari. So I guess the new saying is "A busy day keeps the mind away"...from social networking that is.

Until Tomorrow...

*This entry should be excused since I wrote during the day but I am not accepting any responsibility for any spelling or grammatical errors.*


No Status Updates written down today.

Day 3 - March 11, 2011 (37 Days to go)

It has not even been a whole week into Lent and its already easier to go throughout the day. Less "twitches" and curiousity with wanting to log into social networking. Or maybe it was the fact that I was super busy at work and had very little time to think about it. I did stay focused all day for the first time in a very long time. Does lack of social networking play a part in that? Less time thinking of Facebook or Twitter and more focus? Could be but there's still 37 days left to find out. Being that I've had work to help keep me busy this weekend should prove to be interesting. I do have a busy Saturday planned with Shanna's baby shower and then planning on getting out and having some "adult time". Tonight after work I saw I had a package from the mail! I read "Brookly Grey" right away. WOW! I need to go write a review on it. Oh yeah I do belive that writing down and sharing my updates with Michelle helps too. I don't feel so bottled up anymore. Mia thought it was so hilarious when Michelle told her about writing down her updates. She laughed big time! I think its great. My texting is still happening big time. Not sure if I'm compensating or not but for now I'm not complaining. I'm just thankful right now that I have friends that talk as much as I do. LOL

Until tomorrow...


*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for spelling and grammatical errors*


Status Updates:

9:15am - Holy Hotness Joe Carter from HLN Morning Express! Its gonna be a good day waking up to thsoe dimples!

1:46pm - ________ cracks me up with the popcorn thing!

1:52pm - Mia is highly amused at me & Chelle...ok Chelle mostly for writing down our updates. She said we're still social networking just amongst the 2 of us.

2:22pm - Heads or tails? Whats the decision gonna be?

2:30pm - I really need to stop listening to Jamie Foxx ...(edited at my discretion)

5:21pm - Watching infrared image of tsunami...CRAZY!

5:24pm - SD to AW: you listen to country? AW: No only love songs. Me: LMFAO

8:11pm - Was in teh drive through and my daughter opened her purse saying she wanted to pay. Then got mad when I told her no and to save her money.

9:15pm - Daughter came in the room with her fake jewelry & teddy bear around her wrist telling me "I've been married 7 times, the bear is #7.

9:19pm - Now she says she got married 3 more times & 9 of them were rich (the rings she was wearing) and 1 was not (the bear). Then she looks at the bear & says "poor teddy".

Day 2 - March 10, 2011 (38 days to go)

So this morning was a bit easier than yesterday with no social networking. Chelle & I kept each other busy and entertained with my phone conversations. Between the four different conversations going on and her random updates we stayed sidetracked enough. Unlike me, Michelle is having lots of interesting run ins with people. I should start telling her "Stranger Danger" as a reminder, like she used to tell me. I then go busy with work and throughout the day I began to write down random thoughts that I would normally tweet. Things such as "I'm lovin it" since Tish brough us McDonalds breakfast. She's kinda awesome like that. Even if she did tell me I'd wither away without Facebook or Twitter. HaHa Michelle's husband doesn't think we can last 40 days & nights without our social networks. Who is he to doubt us? Damn him! Roo even tried to tempt me with Twitter today but I stayed strong and didn't budge. Ah que ROOmeo! LOL (Yes I really wrote "lol" in my journal) I have moved teh Facebook and Twitter icons from the start screen on my iTouch and hid them on my Blackberry to help eliminate more of the temptations. Tonight I laughed for like an hour straight while talking to Kari! Did I mention that I love my friends for supporting me through my Lent detox? Thank goodness for unlimited text and free "V network" minutes. Lots more text and phone calls. I may actually have to start keeping track of my minutes for the first time since I've moved back stateside 4 years ago. I didn't check my email as much today but I think that was due to a heavy workload and practice today. Although my phone did die today at practice. Thats only happened one other time (maybe 2). I just have to keep reminding myself that I can do this! Pogo is definitely helping out as well, tons of games to keep me busy after work and after the kids are in bed. Oh, I almost forgot that I told Jessica that I gave it up for Lent. LOL (yes I really wrote it again) She had already figured but was giving me 24 hours before she sent the search party and called to check up on me. Yes! My social networking was that bad, no exaggeration when I said it was my biggest guilty pleasure.

Until tomorrow...




*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for spelling and grammatical errors.*

Status Updates:

9:44am - Gotta love when you've been at work 30 min and it takes 25 to reboot. Guess I'll tame the eyebrows.

9:45am - "I'm lovin' it" love McD's breakfast. I have the best coworkers!

11:59am - LOL I crack myself up...ROOmeo!

12:35pm - Who the hell asks for options when asked an open ended questions?

5:44pm - YAY *\o/* one of my girls learned the cartwheel today lol

6:07pm - Who on God's green earth foesn't eat popcorn when watching a movie!?

Day 1 - March 9, 2011 (39 days to go)

Today was Ash Wednesday, the first day of Lent. Normally I give up chocolate or alcohol but being as how these are no longer staples in my life I didn't. I had a hard time deciding what to "give up" and in a last minute decision I decided that my biggest guilty pleasure was social networking. Not so much MySpace but Facebook and Twitter. I have become so addicted that the internet has become my reality to a certain extent.

Today was very tough with me picking up my phone (more times than I 'd like to admit) to log into Twitter. Even if just to send an update on Facebook was easier to go through the day with, until I got home that is. I had numerous things I'd "update" throughout the day but had to stay strong so I decided to journal. Michelle was a huge support for me today! Yes, I convinced her to go on this journey with me. We can do this together with each others support. I'm sure as the days go by it will get easier and easier. But to quit "cold turkey", so to speak, it's tough! Today we had a rep from NCL come for presentations at work. This guy was absolutely hilarious! Met him and Tish at Elephant Bar and damn near pee'd myself. Had great conversation, swapping stories and laughing. This truly helped me get through my first day of no social networking. Now for another day.

Until tomorrow...

*I journal nightly before bed and am not responsible for spelling and grammtical errors.*


Status Updates:

Testing...1,2....

(oh man I wish I could remember the rest)

40 Days and 40 Nights...of NO Social Networking

With the season of Lent upon us I sat and sat the night before trying to decide what I was going to give up. Yes most were too busy out partying and celebrating the last drunken night better known as Fat Tuesday. For the past few years I have given up chocolate. I felt that was my biggest guilty pleasure. I even gave up alcohol one year. Piece of cake right. So after much joking and contemplating I decided to give up social networking. I saw several people "notify" others of their Lenten quest but I went out with no notice. I had talked about it jokingly on Facebook but never said I was actually going to give it up because at the time I felt I would be took weak to follow through for the 40 days and nights. This last minute decision is going to be quite the journey. I have literally become addicted to social networking. What person does that? Mostly Facebook and Twitter but I do still have an active MySpace account that I very rarely log into. All day long on Twitter and many hours on Facebook have been a part of my daily routine for over a year now. Wish me luck and feel free to provide any support needed during my journey of self discipline.

**edited**
I must add that I haven't posted on this blog (which I created originally to host my MySpace blogs in an effort to delete my MySpace profile) in a very long time and the last thing I posted , in November 2009, was about social networking and the laziness it has given people. Take a look.